Quick Summary
To choose a family mediator, check their accreditation and training, get the fee structure in writing, ask how long the process takes, confirm child-focused and virtual options, check whether they can issue a Section 60I certificate, and ask how they handle conflicts of interest and impartiality. A good family mediator stays neutral and makes the process clear before you commit.
Last Updated: November 4, 2026
Choosing a family mediator is one of the most important decisions you will make during separation or divorce. The right mediator can help you and your ex reach agreement, while the wrong one can drag out the process and cost you more. Maatouks is an award-winning legal firm with over 22 years of experience, and our team, led by an Accredited Mediator and Family Law Dispute Resolution Practitioner, understands how much a good fit matters. Below, we walk through six questions to ask before you commit to a family mediator.
A family mediator is a neutral third party who helps separating couples talk through issues such as parenting arrangements and property. The mediator does not take sides or make decisions for you. Instead, they guide the conversation so both people can find workable solutions.
Because the mediator shapes how the conversation runs, their skill and approach affect the result. A calm, structured process can lower conflict. A poorly run one can leave both people more frustrated than before.
Keep these points in mind:
Start by checking whether the mediator is accredited and how they were trained. Ask for proof of accreditation rather than relying on a title alone.
Ask the mediator to confirm their accreditation and the body that granted it.
Look for these details when you review a mediator’s background:
Our Principal is an Accredited Mediator and Family Law Dispute Resolution Practitioner, so you can ask for these details directly when you book a mediation consultation.
Cost is one of the first things people ask about, and one of the easiest things for a provider to answer vaguely. Ask for a written fee schedule before you book, and compare it line by line with any other mediator you are considering. Family dispute resolution cost varies by provider, by the number of sessions and by how complex your matter is, so a single headline rate tells you very little on its own.
Most providers structure fees in one of three ways, and you should know which model you are being quoted:
Whichever model applies, ask these questions and get the answers in writing:
Ask for an estimate of the all-in cost for a matter like yours, not just the session rate, and ask what would cause that estimate to change.
Watch out: a mediator who will not put fees in writing, or who quotes a rate without explaining what it excludes, is giving you a warning sign rather than a quote.
We offer a free phone consultation so you can talk through your situation and ask about fees before you commit. For current costs, contact us for a quote.
The article sets out the three common fee models and the questions to ask about each.
| Fee model | How it is charged | What to check |
|---|---|---|
| Hourly rate | Pay for time in session and preparation | Final bill depends on how long the matter runs |
| Session or half-day rate | Fixed amount per mediation session | Confirm whether intake and certificates are included |
| Fixed fee for a defined process | Set amount for stated sessions and outputs | Check what happens if more sessions are needed |
Ask how long the process usually takes and what affects the timeline. Some matters are resolved in a few sessions, while others take longer, especially where there is significant conflict or many issues to settle.
The timeline usually depends on:
Ask the mediator for a realistic estimate at the first meeting.
If children are involved, ask how the mediator keeps the children’s needs at the centre of the discussion. A child-focused mediator does more than mention the children: they structure the conversation around the child’s best interests, separate parenting issues from adult grievances, and can explain how children’s views may be heard without putting the child in the middle of the dispute. Keeping the child’s needs distinct from adult grievances can also clarify whether the couple needs support with their relationship, making selecting a marriage coach a separate decision from choosing a mediator.
Ask specifically:
Virtual mediation is an option worth discussing with your mediator, and it deserves its own set of questions. It can suit people who live far apart, have mobility or transport difficulties, or find it hard to be in the same room as an ex-partner. But the technology and the privacy arrangements matter, and a mediator who has not thought them through can create problems that an in-person session would not.
Ask about the platform and the safeguards:
A common pattern is for providers to offer both formats and let the parties choose per session. Ask whether you can switch between in-person and online sessions as the matter progresses, and whether the fee differs between the two.
Watch out: a mediator who cannot explain how the online platform protects privacy, or who has no plan for a participant joining from an unsuitable location, is offering convenience without the safeguards that make virtual mediation work.
If you plan to apply to the court for parenting orders, you may need a Section 60I certificate. This certificate shows that you attended family dispute resolution, or that an exception applies, before you filed. Our team can provide Section 60I certificates, so ask whether this is part of the service you are considering.
Ask the mediator directly:
The rules on when a certificate is needed are set out in Australian family law, and they can change. Check current requirements before you rely on them. For a deeper look at how overseas assets are treated in property settlement, read our guide on overseas assets in property settlement in Australia.
A mediator must stay neutral. Ask how they check for conflicts of interest and how they keep the process fair when one person is more confident or more difficult to deal with.
Good answers usually include:
If your ex is hostile, ask how the mediator manages that conflict. Our approach to difficult relationships is covered in 7 steps to family mediation with a hostile ex.
Be cautious if a mediator avoids your questions, pushes you to sign quickly, or cannot show proof of accreditation. Also watch for vague fee answers and anyone who seems to take sides.
Choosing a family mediator is a big decision, and you should not have to make it alone. If you want to compare your options, read our full mediation process guide to see how the steps fit together.
When you are ready, speak with our team. We offer a free phone consultation, so you can ask your questions and understand your options before you commit. Call Maatouks today to book your free phone consultation and take the first step toward a fair outcome.
Ask any family mediator for proof of their accreditation and confirm their qualifications before you engage them. Experience in family law matters, particularly parenting and property disputes, is also worth confirming before you engage them.
Fees for family dispute resolution depend on the complexity of your matter, the number of sessions required, and whether you are using a private practitioner or a service with government funding. Maatouks does not publish fixed prices in this article, so pricing depends on your circumstances. Ask for a written fee estimate before the first session, and check whether a free initial phone consultation is available so you can compare options without committing.
Family mediation usually runs over one or several sessions, with the total timeframe depending on how many issues are in dispute and how cooperative both parties are. Simpler matters may be resolved in a single session, while complex parenting or property disputes often take several. Ask your mediator for an estimated number of sessions at the intake stage so you can plan around work and childcare.
Whether a section 60I certificate is needed depends on your circumstances, so confirm with your practitioner before you book. Confirm with your practitioner whether a certificate is needed for your situation before you book.
